Those who know me know I tend to have irregular sleeping habits. Well, last night, I resolved to get a good night's rest and failed miserably. I got in the bed around 8pm but woke up around 10:30pm, wide awake and could not immediately get back to sleep. So what did I do? I read a book, watched TV, and, of course, perused my friends' posts on Facebook and Twitter. And yes, I did all these things at the same time.
In the midst of my adult ADHD bliss, I noticed a buzzing sound and located the fly that was making it. It was a huge fly and was moving around my room, attracted to the main light source. I watched it for a while and had to laugh at myself because I was seriously concentrating on this thing. It came in through my Southeast facing window and landed on the ceiling, inching closer and closer to the light fixture. I'd seen it happen many times before: a fly or ladybug would get in my room, fall in love with the light, and fall in the light fixture. Sometimes it would get out. Other times, it just laid there and was burned by the bulb's intense heat and I had to stretch my arms to again clean the light fixture. Well, I really paid attention to this fly to see if I could learn something. Hey, don't judge me; by this time, it was about 1am and I was kinda sleepy but still intrigued.
Well, this fly did just as I thought it would: it inched along the ceiling closer and closer to the light until it got so close it fell in the light fixture. It sat there for a few minutes, but after realizing it would be burned, it struggled to get out the lamp. Although the sides were slippery, it would continue to attempt to climb up the sides but would slide down. It took this fly several attempts before it decided to try to fly out. When it finally escaped a sure death, it repeated the process. I watched this fly again and again face destruction and, although I seriously despise flies, I was kind of hoping it would learn its lesson and not get so close to the light. Well, you know what happened. The stupid fly fell back in the light fixture, chilled for a few minutes, then burned, then struggled to get out, then got out but again flirted with disaster as it inched closer and closer.
Ok, so I decided to help the fly out...and experiment. I turned off the main light to see what Mr. Fly would do since he'd fallen in the light fixture. He stayed there until I turned on my desk lamp, then flew out and inched closer to that one. So of course, I had to play with the fly and I turned off the desk lamp and again flicked on the main light. And of course, the cycle started all over again: flirty walking around the light on the ceiling, getting close to it, then falling in. By this time, it was almost 2am and I put my book down, turned off my light, and went to sleep.
So why am I talking about flies here on a sex and relationship blog? Well, because sometimes, we can be just as silly as a fly in a light fixture. We'll be in relationships we know are destructive, yet we stick around for the benefits, whether real or perceived: companionship, body heat, or the flood of emotions we feel when we're held. Then we get burned. The partner might step out or just isn't good to us and we'll leave for a while, but try to stick around just enough to get those benefits...only to fall back into a situation that may burn us.
Sounds kinda hopeless, eh? Well, it's not. God ALWAYS provides a way of escape. I Corinthians 10:13 tells us that whenever we are tempted God will provide a way out. However, you have the choice to exit. If you want to stay there and get burned, it's totally your choice. Howbeit, God provides that open door and He tells us to flee temptation (2 Timothy 2:22). Nope, don't power walk away from it, don't walk briskly, but RUN! AWAY! IN THE OPPOSITE DIRECTION! Again, it's completely your choice though. Just like with this silly fly. The opening of the light fixture is HUGE and at any point, it could fly out, but it would try to scale the slippery sides and would fall right back to the danger zone.
We will always be met with tempting situations. I'm reminded of Jill Scott's song "Across My Mind." At the end, she says, "In the end, you were never good for me and I was never good for you. I just remember what we used to do." Yep...I know it's tempting. "Can't nobody hold me the way he/she did!" "You can't even imagine how great the sex was!" You're right...but if you don't remind yourself of the danger you left, you might be sitting at the bottom of the light fixture, just like that fly still is because I was too lazy this morning to get it out....
1 Corinthians 10:13
Amplified Bible (AMP)
For no temptation (no trial regarded as enticing to sin), [no matter how it comes or where it leads] has overtaken you and laid hold on you that is not common to man [that is, no temptation or trial has come to you that is beyond human resistance and that is not adjusted and adapted and belonging to human experience, and such as man can bear]. But God is faithful [to His Word and to His compassionate nature], and He [can be trusted] not to let you be tempted and tried and assayed beyond your ability and strength of resistance and power to endure, but with the temptation He will [always] also provide the way out (the means of escape to a landing place), that you may be capable and strong and powerful to bear up under it patiently.
2 Timothy 2:22
Amplified Bible (AMP)
Shun youthful lusts and flee from them, and aim at and pursue righteousness (all that is virtuous and good, right living, conformity to the will of God in thought, word, and deed); [and aim at and pursue] faith, love, [and] peace (harmony and concord with others) in fellowship with all [Christians], who call upon the Lord out of a pure heart.